I’m two weeks into my second semester of college. Normally that would mean I’ve had 10 days of class, but I’ve had more like 8.5, because of MLK day + a snow-induced half day. Aw yeah, that means that after 12pm yesterday, I had the freedom to play an unfulfilling game of Cards of Humanity before napping for 2 hours. The snow didn’t really start until the evening, but Georgia’s previous failures with handling inclement weather has made them extra cautious. I’m not complaining. The night of snow was awesome, with a snowball fight between any and every student outside.
What I really want to talk about in this post is friendship. Last night was one of the most fun nights here at Tech, and the thing is that I wasn’t hanging out with my usual group who I spent nearly weekend and meal with. Instead, I was with a group of people I had talked to only a few times in my life. They were all nice and it was just a great time. The reason this is so disconcerting to me is the fact that I spent most of last semester trying to join and be included in this one friend group. However, the more time that I spend with them, the more I realize I don’t feel like I belong. Beyond that basic feeling, I don’t even know if I feel like that these people are my friends. There are a few of people I’ve met in school that I completely trust to have my back, but I don’t feel like that exists with any of the group. Everyone seems to have their own person to talk to within the group and everyone seems to talk shit about other people int he group. It’s all so dramatic and unnecessary. Maybe I’m not the type of person who can deal with chilling in a group.
I’m just trying to figure it out man.